Years ago, we “played 9 holes” of bar golf for a birthday party. It was a ton of fun.
The rules are fun things:
- You have to wear golfing attire. (And at the first one we went to, it cost you a stroke on every hole if you didn’t, so one friend was begging us all to trade outfits or whatever so she wouldn’t suck so bad. I gave her a golf tee to put in her hair.)
- Some “must not do” things (getting too drunk, being a bad participant, etc.) can cost you a stroke or even get you booted.
- There are different drinks for bogey, par, birdie, eagle, and hole in one.
- Some bars are a water hazard, and if you go pee in that bar, you lose a stroke.
The guy who designed our first one was way ambitious and made the game to hard. I won by being the only person still drinking at the 9th hole (because I stayed on par and didn’t try to get an Eagle at every hole). It was a blast for us. I’m not sure anyone else remembers that night.
So when we found one this year, we had to sign up. ☺️ I thrifted a cute golf skirt. He made his “QUIET” sign to hold up. We were ready! And then we didn’t hear anything. 😢
Still, we showed up to the first bar, Swanky’s, at 12noon to check in and get started. It was 9 bars in 9 hours, but it wasn’t a crawl. Instead, you were supposed to go in any order you wanted. We weren’t sure that would even work, but we wanted to try.
We got to Swanky’s at 12:15 and found four large tables of people in golf attire with lanyards and score cards. Turns out, this was their “friends only” crawl for charity. They had even scaled it back from last year because there had been some drama. I guess we looked drama-free because the leader invited us to join anyway. We paid her the $20 they had all paid for the charity element, got our cards, and joined them. The hostess even gave us bogey credit for the first bar they had been to an hour earlier.
Turns out, several of them all went to UCF (a campus I used to work at) and another went to FSU (so we bonded over our shared “hate” for Florida). All of them had the same “get the fuck out” attitude about Floriduh that we do about Texass, so we fit right in.
It was a blast! This was their third year. At first, I was leery of some of the bars they had chosen (and wondered if we’d just take our own path after all), but on a Saturday afternoon, even the “bad” ones were fine. And every bar had the Master’s on TV since that was the biggest sports event of the day. There was a food break in the middle. It was even at a cool food court we didn’t even know existed.
We got to try a couple of new-to-us bars. Our group got a ton of good/fun attention. After a four-way tie for first place, they did a chug-and-flip-cup contest to determine fourth, third, and second placers before declaring a winner. The hostess even has a green “Masters” jacket for the winner to wear at the end (and have the year and his name added to on the inside). Best of all, they were all super nice. I hope we get invited next year.
As for the original crawl we were supposed to be on? We saw five+ people who looked lost, confused, and disappointed. I was sad that I couldn’t say, “oh just come join us.” Had it been our crawl, I totally would have.
By the end of the crawl, we were hungry again and the Avalanche were on, so we wrapped up the night at our favorite sports bar for dinner and the game. Sadly, we wore the cursed uniforms and lost. And our coach took a puck to the face and will be out a couple of games. But we are for sure in the playoffs..
